in limbo

it's weird, i'm so used to being on the move, that when i'm not traveling it feels like I'm doing nothing. when i'm at home, my days just vanish in a blur of books, music, quizup, facebook, WhatsApp, sleep, and I'm not sure what else.

is this what drives all the people around me to take up stuff like gym, following sports, tv and stuff? because it feels like my life's missing something right now. and other than travel, i'm not sure what it could be.

calm like a bomb

I realized long ago that one vital ingredient of sustainable happiness is keeping my balance. and for some reason, for the last few months, I have stopped doing that... or for that matter, even trying to.

it feels like I might have a major disaster headed my way, but until that happens, I seem to be doing just fine.

I wonder now, do I need to brace myself for impact... or should I simply rethink my principles?

randomness

my vjti classmate-friends and i were at a rented flat. it was the morning after a random sleepover. i remember siddharth, prasad, sachin, gaurang, shweta, komal, niti, reshma. we were supposed to be going to work, me before the rest, because I had to reach office at 830 am. I was getting ready while everyone else was just lazing around and recounting stories of the previous night. chit-chatting with them, I realized it was already 830, and i was going to be late. anyway, I figured that it was fine as long as I reached by 930, as we had a team dinner the previous night, and everyone else would probably be late as well (strangely, i didn't realize the contradiction, considering I also thought I had a sleepover last night!) when i was on my bike, on these unfamiliar roads, it was quite obvious that my dream wasn't set in bbay, but possibly in pune.

i picked up my teammate pratik on the way, and we had to then ride through a slightly wooded area. the weather was pleasant, but the air was moist, as if it might rain any time. as we passed through this area, i saw a clearing, with low walls but no gate. inside, the ground was grassy, and there was an asbestos shed with benches, as well as some concrete benches outside. pratik and i decided we'll take a break here for a bit, so i parked on the road and we sat on one of the benches a distance from the shed. we made random conversation for a few minutes, until we suddenly heard music. a group of three (a guy with a guitar, and another guy and girl) were walking towards us, singing the Herman's Hermits song "no milk today". i started talking to pratik about how I loved this song and grew up listening to it.

the group of three walked past us, and continued towards the shed. we picked our bags and followed them there. when we reached the shed, they were playing another familiar song from the '60s. i discreetly tried to record a video of them, and later tried to just record the audio. by now, a small group had gathered around, maybe around 10 or 12 people, mostly sitting around on the benches in the shed. the band had a full ensemble now, with a drum set and the works. they played another favorite song, and we both decided we would like a cigarette. i figured there might be a shop nearby on the road, so i left the shed and walked towards there.

there was no shop at all, and in fact nothing but forest on both sides of the plot we were at. disappointed, i turned to walk back, when a piglet, dirty and squealing, rubbed itself against my leg, depositing a lot of muck and possibly shit on it. the piglet was filthy and i didn't want to touch it, so i called for help, hoping someone would get a stick or something to shoo it off. instead, a passerby guy grabbed the piglet and nudged it away. I told him the piglet was filthy, and he then noticed that his hands were quite mucked too.

turns out the shed had a very rudimentary toilet, and there was a bucket of water in it. we washed up, and i got back to where the band was playing, and was surprised to see that nickolai had just arrived too. she was wearing the same white dress that i remember she wore last Friday. we sat listening to the band for a while, till I decided it was time to go. we left (i'm not sure how, since there were 3 of us now, but i remember nickolai was on the bike with me).

suddenly, it turned extremely overcast and started to drizzle. we hurriedly parked and took shelter in a roadside shed, which was already quite full of people taking refuge under it. it was actually a tea stall and as the drizzle turned into a heavy downpour, we got ourselves a cutting chai each.

that's when i realized it was nearing sunset. somehow, the entire day had passed. i would have to somehow explain missing the entire day of work.

and that's when my alarm went off. 6:30am. time to get to work.

my favourite camping spots

i started camping way back in 2005, when i was still a student. it was thanks to my friend dhruva (a.k.a. "fatak") who gave me his tent, saying he didn't expect to use it ever again. it was a biggish 4-man tent, which could hold upto 6 in a pinch. back then, i only knew of one camping spot, and that's actually how it stayed for over 5 years! thankfully, with my trekking and riding, i've had a chance to explore a few more spots - and i have a few more that i'd love to try.

kashid beach

kashid is the aforementioned first camping spot. it's still one of my favourites, thanks to the sea (i *LOVE* the sea!) and the proximity of facilities (washrooms/shops). besides, familiarity does *not* breed contempt. i must have camped there at least 15 times!

directions: this spot on the beach is near kashid village, not the other end (the other end is overrun by cheap tourists and overpriced stalls - no way i'd camp there!). to find the spot, look for a bridge over a small stream, after kashid village. take the first narrow lane towards the beach, after the bridge.

kolad

this is the second camping spot i discovered, and probably had the biggest adventure to get to, and i'm not sure if it's camp-able any more: we had gone there by car, and managed to get to the river only because a couple of fences were broken. the car also got stuck and had a flat tire, but isn't that what fun is all about? our camping spot was also on private property (a partially fenced-in farm), so we kinda hid and camped. not for the faint hearted. but the river is worth it: it's wide and calm, and the water is a little over waist deep until quite far in. perfect.

directions: this is next to where the river rafting ends. about 200 metres downriver from the rafting end spot. the left side of the river, when facing seaward. gps coordinates: 18.440665, 73.260625

bhandardara

an accessible camping spot, but not all that great because the mtdc resort is barely 100 feet away, and literally overlooks our spot.

directions: follow your gps to mtdc bhandardara. the way to the camping spot is through the village (or if on foot, down the steps from the restaurant towards the lake)

purushwadi

one of our most inaccessible camping spots. getting there involves a fair bit of off-roading on two wheelers, and a 2 km walk through fields if on four wheeler. the beauty of this spot is the chilly climate and the isolation (the nearest shop is in the 2-km-away adivasi village, and it's the only shop in a 10 km radius - don't even expect bottled water to be available there!).

directions: get to purushwadi from rajur (it's a right turn at rajur off the road going to akole). there's no mobile network for the last few kms, so your best bet is to ask passers-by for directions if you're lost. and don't even think of attempting it after sunset. the spot overlooks kurkundi dam.

malshej

a recent discovery, this is the perfect camping spot: accessible by road, 1 km from the national highway, 2 km from the nearest shops. the nearby village has plenty of hay, even though firewood is slightly harder to come by. only possible drawback: you might find random people hanging out for a clandestine drink by the lake. but that's a matter of luck, and we've been lucky so far.

directions: get to mtdc malshej, and continue along the national highway for about (i think) two curves, after which you'll find a narrow tar road branching off to the left. at that spot on the highway, on your right, you'll see the aforementioned last shop. the spot overlooks pimpalgaon joga dam.

naneghat

right next to malshej (you can see the pinnacle of naneghat from the malshej camping spot!), this spot is slightly less accessible by road, but can also be trekked to. there are caves at naneghat, which is why i've never actually camped there (despite having lugged my camping gear all the way till there), but camping remains an equally attractive possibility.

directions: continue along the highway past mtdc malshej, until the right turn off the highway that goes to junnar. there are no clearly mapped roads (most of them are barely dirt tracks!), and mobile network is mostly non-existent, so you'll need to ask villagers for directions to ghatgarh/naneghat.

tungarli

close to lonavla, accessible by good road, this camping spot is quite popular now, and hence comes with the usual pitfalls - including unruly drinkers in the day. the perfect camping spot requires a walk on the dam wall to the other side. you need to inform the caretaker of your intention to camp, else you might be rudely chucked out post-sunset. tungarli dam has a reputation for people attempting to swim and drowning, so it's under a bit of scrutiny, but nothing that should spoil the experience if you take permission from the caretaker.

directions: the camping spot is tungarli lake, which is slightly further away from tungarli village. pass through the lonavla market, and take the left to tungarli, go under the expressway (there's no direct connection to the expressway itself!) and get to the lake. the spot on the other side of the dam wall is better for camping, but there's a clearing on the road side of the dam wall where vehicles can be parked.

khandala

the one's far from perfect, for two reasons: no nearby water source, and the expressway is near enough for you to hear vehicles honk and trucks howl through the night. it's still a good 1 km or so of an actual walk from the nearest parkable spot though. also, i've been warned about snakes (the grass was about 2 feet high in jan when i went, so that's a rather scary prospect!). best for camping at night, as there are bound to be curious (and possibly interfering) authorities in the day, thanks to its proximity to lonavla and khandala, the associated unruly crowd, and the fact that you're passing through church-owned private property to get to the spot.

directions: at the first expressway exit (khandala), take a left towards st. mary's villa. cut across the compound, down to the next hill, and up to the next, until you get to the cliff.

abhishek (or why some people will live forever)

it's unbelievable how, days after I had a conversation about my beliefs regarding "death being a celebration of the fullness life", I received the news of abhi's untimely passing away. there are very few people who have made such a difference to my life, and definitely none else who managed to do so despite living in different cities and even countries for many of the years since we got to know each other.

abhishek and I met when we were halfway through college, by virtue of us both being in the comps department for malhar. despite the general geekiness that pervaded those first couple of months, it's surprising how we found so much common ground, from movies, to music, to books, and even food. but I guess abhishek and I connected so well because we shared our attitude to life. in retrospect, abhi has a greater part to play in me becoming the person that I currently am, than I ever imagined possible. and I think that's the mark of an awesome person. he touched lives without making it seem so. most of my friends would say I'm a happy person, with a positivity that sometimes borders on the irrational. but abhishek is one person who I've never seen sad or depressed, even in situations where I'm sure I would have been. and it wasn't a fake happiness. he genuinely saw the humour in everything, and I'm glad I've picked up a bit of that from him.

and so, I remind myself yet again that he lived life to the fullest, and that, hard as it may seem, the only way to honour his legacy is to carry it forward as he would.

as I wipe a silent tear from my eye, I remember one of those late evenings in college, in the comps room, playing unreal tournament, teamed up against "godlike" level bots, us humans equally matched with the game's AI, our teamwork against their accuracy, palms sweating, adrenaline pumping, until the server unexpectedly crashed. we were sad, because the game ended before we thought we had won. but the sadness was only till we realized we had held our own against what felt like an incredible challenge. and it strikes me that this isn't the end for abhi either. he has simply turned "godlike" :)